You Only Live Once
by rosyle
Summary: “For once, I stopped thinking with my head and listened to my heart.” Story takes place during and directly after “The Woman in the Sand”. Sort of an extended missing scene fic


**Title:** You Only Live Once  
**Author:** rosyle  
**Pairing:** Booth/Brennan  
**Raiting:** K/PG  
**Spoilers:** "The Woman in the Sand"  
**Summary:** "For once, I stopped thinking with my head and listened to my heart."  
(Story takes place during and directly after "The Woman in the Sand". Sort of an extended missing scene fic)  
**Notes:** Once again, I have to give a HUGE thanks to my beta. She truly is the best Zack ever!  
**Disclaimer:** I don't own Bones or the characters (even though I wish I did).

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I had heard the stories, but I had never actually witnessed Booth fight. Seeing him like that - in all his "Alpha Male" glory, punching the crap out of that punching bag—I had to admit that I was rather impressed. The undercover gig had turned out quite differently than initially expected. I mean, I figured it would be a rush, but it was so much more. Never before had I really had the opportunity to step outside myself and do things that I usually didn't, but this case allowed me to do that.

Snapping back into reality—and character—I handed Booth back his hat and coat.

"So much for my _has-been_ army fighter," I countered. Joe Nolan might have been a great boxer back in his day, but it was obvious that Booth could take him in a heartbeat.

"Not Bad," Joe replied. He seemed to be as impressed with Booth, or rather _Tony_, as I had been.

Suddenly, I felt an arm wrap around my shoulder and pull me closer in proximity to Booth—a little closer than either of us had been used to. Our eyes locked for a second and I felt something pass between us. It was similar to what I had felt earlier in the day when he had seemed to be entranced as I stepped out of the bathroom wearing this black dress—that he, of course, had picked out for me. I wasn't quite sure what it meant, but it was definitely something. As Temperance, I would have tried to rationalize this and push down whatever I was feeling, but as Roxy, I needed to harness those feeling and go with them. But were those looks coming from Booth or was he just playing his part?

"Yeah," I said as I playfully jabbed him in the ribs. "Maybe a little too much."

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"So, what's your name?" Joe asked me.

"Tony Scanlon," I replied as I pulled Bones closer to me, our noses nearly touching. "And this here is my fiancé, Roxanne."

"We're more engaged, to be engaged," She chuckled. As she turned to look at me I realized that her face was just mere inches from my own. It took practically everything in my power not to just bridge that tiny gap and kiss her. I mean we were undercover, so it wouldn't have been out of line for me to do so, _and_, after all, we had to keep up our appearance as a _believable_ couple. If I was being totally honest with myself, this wasn't the first time I had had this feeling. It's just that, at those other times, I had known that acting on them wouldn't have been right. I was fully aware of our ever evolving relationship—even though I wasn't sure that Bones was—but I didn't want to push our boundaries too far, too fast. Instead, I just stood there—grinning back at her like an idiot and getting lost in her charcoal-lined eyes. God, she was beautiful.

"So, you looking to train, or what?" Almost lost in the moment, I barely realized that Joe had just asked me a question. Focus, Booth. We were there for a reason. This wasn't the time to sort out my feelings for Bones. We'd been doing this dance for a while, and it could continue a bit longer—I don't think the world was planning on ending anytime soon. Besides, at that moment we were Tony and Roxy. Not Booth and Bones.

We had questioned Joe as to where we could find some "underground action," but he didn't take the bait at first. Turns out, Joe wasn't as dumb as I was hoping he was. He wasn't going to give up any info without securing our trust.

"1,000 buck. Each," Joe demanded. Unfortunately, I'd left my FBI checkbook back at the hotel, so it didn't look like we were going to get what we were after.

"Noo, Tony. Come on, we only live once," Bones whined. I turned to look at her, trying to figure out what she had up her sleeve, only to realize that it was what she had hidden elsewhere that was gonna bail us out.

"I wanna see ya fight," she said as she untangled herself from my grasp, walked towards Joe, and handed him a wad of cash she had pulled from her cleavage. Turning back to me, she smiled. She returned to my side and snuggled up to me again. The sense of accomplishment she felt was clear in the look she gave me.

"Nothing like being a kept man," Nick jabbed.

I have no idea where she got the money from, and at that very moment I really didn't care. All I could think about was how amazing that woman was.

"Yeah, I don't know what I'd do without her," I said. And that was the truth. Not just as Tony but as Booth too. She always seems to amaze me more and more each day. Without a second thought, I leaned over and kissed her—like I'd wanted to do for months.

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A week had passed since the kiss in Vegas, and I had no idea why it was still on my mind. It's not like we slept together; it was only a kiss. So why is it that we never talked about it? Had he been Tony or Booth at that moment?

I forced myself to stop these thoughts, as they were completely illogical. Booth had kissed me because that's what engaged couples do. He was simply playing a part. That's all.

"Earth to Brennan…come in, Brennan," said a voice, breaking through my internal, irrational debate. I looked up from my computer screen to see Angela standing in front of me, holding a cup in her hand. "Welcome back. I was about to drink this cup of coffee myself if you didn't respond soon."

"Huh? What? Sorry, Ange. I was just thinking..."

"I can see that. Actually, you've been doing quite a lot of that lately. Having hot and steamy daydreams about our favorite funky sock lovin' FBI guy again?" She joked.

"Are you talking about Booth?"

"Sweetie, how many other guys do you know that would be caught dead leaving the house with pink and purple stripes on his socks?" She smiled, placed the cup of coffee in front of me, and took a seat.

We sat in silence for the next few minutes—I checked my email while Angela just sat there, staring at me. Keeping my focus on the computer screen, I asked, "Ange, is there some reason that you're sitting there, staring at me like I'm a piece of artwork you can't figure out?"

"Well, you got part of it right. Sometimes, I really can't figure you out," Angela sighed. "I've actually been meaning to ask you something, sweetie. Did anything happen between you and Booth in Vegas?"

I brought my eyes up from the screen to meet hers. It's common knowledge that she has "a sense" about certain things, but I had thought that Booth and I had pretty much kept the status quo when it came to our relationship upon our return. Maybe I was wrong. "Why—why would you say that?"

"It's just that..." she paused. "I don't know. It seems like there's this thing between you now that wasn't there before you left for Vegas. Like something needs to be talked about, but it hasn't." She shrugged. "Chalk it up to my 'spooky senses' or whatever, but something just seems off with you guys. That and, apparently, he ended things with Cam a few days ago."

He did? Why hadn't he mentioned that to me?

"Oh, really? He hasn't said anything to me about it. Why would he have though? I think I was the last person to find out that he and Cam were together in the first place..." That came out a bit more bitter than I had intended.

"Brennan, in all honesty, Booth and Cam were never going to last. I think Booth knew that from the start, which is why he pursued a relationship with her—and I use the term 'relationship' lightly. I'm sorry that I didn't tell you when I found out about it, but Hodgins–"

"We kissed in Vegas," I stated quickly.

"You what?" Angela squealed. "Bren! Why didn't you tell me?"

"It was just a kiss, Ange. There was nothing really to tell. It happened and that's that."

"Have you talked to him about it?"

"No. There was no need. We were undercover pretending to be an engaged couple. Engaged couples kiss. That's all it was," I stated matter-of-factly, hoping that I was doing a better job convincing her than I was myself.

"Who are you trying to convince? Me or yourself?"

Busted.

"Brennan," Angelia continued. "You need to talk to the man. You might be trying to convince yourself that it's 'just a kiss,' but this is you and Booth we're talking about. You guys are like the 'will they/won't they' couple of the year. A kiss between you two could never be 'just a kiss.'"

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How can there be are over 300 channels on TV, yet there never seems to be anything good on? After flipping through them one last time, I finally settled on watching a movie that I had already seen about five times, but at least it was better than getting sucked into watching "Next" on MTV again, like I had a few nights before. That would definitely ruin my "street cred" with the squints if they ever found out. Note to self: Never let that tidbit of info slip.

Just as I had gotten up to head to the kitchen to grab a beer for myself, there was a light knocking at my door. I looked up at the clock—10:13pm—and wondered who's was stopping by that late. Usually, I would have assumed it could only be one person. But, the way things had been going for me up until then, I wouldn't have bet against it being Rebecca or, worse yet, Cam.

She had taken the break-up rather well. After all, Cam is a professional. Since we still have to work together, I don't know why I had expected anything less from her reaction. I knew that she had wanted more from me, but I had nothing left to give—at least not to her. At one time, we'd had something great. But the time had passed, and no matter how much she wanted to rekindle it, it just wasn't going to happen.

I opened the door to find a hesitant-looking Forensic Anthropologist standing in my hallway.

"Is it too late for me to be stopping by?" She looked at me and seemed unsure of herself, which is something that I'm definitely not used to.

"Nah, not at all, Bones. Plus, I see that you brought food," I said, nodding in the general direction of the bag in her hand. "It's never too late if you come bearing food. Anyway, I hear they say that the way into a man's home is through his stomach…" I joked lightly.

"Wait, isn't that the way into a man's—never mind," she caught herself before finishing her sentence. Something was definitely up with her. We gazed at each other for just a moment. I tried to gauge exactly what was going on in that overly analytical brain of hers before I opened the door wider.

"Why don't you come in?" I said, placing my hand on the small of her back and ushering her in. "I'll just go put this in the kitchen." In the kitchen, I turned towards the refrigerator and called out an offer of a beer over my shoulder.

"Beer is fine." She said as she made her way over to the couch.

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Sitting on the couch, I shuffled through some magazines Booth had on his coffee table: _Car and Driver_, _Men's Health_, _Maxim_, _Parenting_, and_ Cosmopolitan._

_Cosmopolitan_? Booth reads a woman's magazine? Guess that explains why women seem to take a liking to him so much.

Concentrating on one of the articles, I hardly even realized Booth had snuck up behind me. He was leaning against the back of the couch, looking over my shoulder. "Seeing if I measure up?"

"Measure up? What are you talking about, Booth. Measure up to what?" I didn't dare look at him.

"The article you're reading," he said, pointing to the magazine in my hands. "'Is He Man Enough For You?'" I could sense his charm smile without even seeing it.

"Oh, that, um…" I quickly closed the magazine and placed it back on the table as Booth joined me on the couch and handed me my beer.

"So, what's up, Bones? I'm sure you didn't just come over here to check out the newest issue of _Cosmo_." There it was again. That damn charm smile of his.

"I just wanted to check if you've made any progress with the Dennison case…" I lied.

"At 10:30 at night? Why don't I believe that for a second?"

"Well, you should. It's the truth, Booth," I stared at my hands as they sat limply in my lap, their fingers laced together, and debated exactly how I wanted to approach the subject. I looked up at him and for a moment said nothing.

"Bones..." He prompted.

"Things have been a bit weird between us ever since…"

"I kissed you in Vegas?" Booth chimed in.

"Yeah. Then." I averted my eyes from his.

"Bones. I—" he started, as he started to reach out to touch my chin. Immediately, I stood up and began pacing in front of the coffee table.

"I'm well aware that neurotransmitters in our brains release dopamine, which cause a temporary infatuation-like state—much like alcohol does—leading two people to find themselves suddenly attracted to each other when no prior interest exists. Pair that with the aforementioned people being in a situation in which they usually wouldn't find themselves, playing roles that, under normal circumstances, they don't play, and I can see how one could get caught up in the moment," I rambled, hoping my scientific jargon would trip up Booth enough for him to just tell me I was crazy and leave it at that.

"Wait," Booth said, as he rose from the couch. He stood in front of me and placed his hands on my arms. "Are you saying that I kissed you because that's what I thought Tony would do in the situation?" I saw him search my eyes for answers.

"Well, isn't that why you did it?" I asked.

"Do _you_ think it is?" He paused and waited for my response. When none comes he continued, "Why did you kiss me back then?"

"Because it was something I felt that Roxy would do," I stated matter-of-factly.

"Okay," he said slowly, as he let go of my arms and headed back to the couch. I couldn't do anything but look at him.

I felt like an idiot. I realized that, obviously, there was more going on here.

"So, feel like chowing down on whatever it is that you brought over in that bag?" Booth suggests.

"Sure. I brought pie from the diner. I remember you mentioned something about cherry being your favorite?" I smiled at him and headed towards the kitchen. He followed me; his hand once again was placed on my lower back.

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We sat in silence for a few minutes, eating the pie that Bones had brought over. How did she know I'd had a craving for a nice slice of cherry pie earlier in the day? I stopped for a moment and just looked at her while she was staring down at her plate. I sensed that there was something else that she wanted to say. Was she trying to tell me that maybe, just maybe, she was interested in taking our relationship a step further?

"Booth, I—" she started and looked from her plate. Shit. She caught me staring. "Thanks for letting me intrude upon your evening, but it's getting rather late and I should probably be getting home."

I watched as she picked up her pie plate and placed it in the sink. Knowing that this might very well be one of those "moments" that Rebecca had told me about when we were together, I rose from my seat and spun Bones around, placing my hand against her cheek.

"I kissed you because I wanted to kiss you. Not as Tony, but as Booth"

We stayed that way—her eyes searching mine and vice-versa—for what seemed like an eternity until her voice broke the silence.

"And I—" she started to speak, but paused to gather her thoughts. "I kissed you back because I wanted to. Not as Roxy, but as myself."

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At my confession, Booth's face lit up.

"So…" he took a step back and put his hand in his pockets, looking down towards his feet as if they were going to provide him with all the answers in the universe. As he looked back up at me, I saw uncertainty in his eyes. "Where do we go from here?"

"I don't know, Booth. When it comes to this," my hand gestured between the two of us. "There is so much at stake."

"Too much to lose," he chimed in.

"Yeah." Now it's my turn to look down at my feet as I recalled the conversation we'd had a few months earlier when I found out that he had slept with Rebecca again.

"Bones," he places a finger under my chin willing my eyes to rise and meet his. "I'm willing to give this a shot if you are. We can take things slowly and see where they lead us."

Looking at him, I realized that there was no place else I would have rather been at that very moment. I left behind all the rational reasons as to why we shouldn't proceeded with this any further and did the only thing that would truly explain how I felt at that moment.

I kissed him.

For once, I stopped thinking with my head and listened to my heart.

After all, you only live once.


End file.
